ground hog day

it seems to me few people want to discover new things or live new adventures. We just want to live the same day over and over as long as we're comfortable. No change please, give me more of the same. I can always go into the past if i want some action.

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by
the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do.
So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor.
Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream.
Discover.

-- Mark Twain

indians bring a summer week

today there were yellow sun swords aplenty...nice and hot. I was cutting wood in our garden - my garten-gym around sunset. And when i had sat down afterwards to enjoy the sunset over the lake and the quiet little forest around me, i heard a scuffling noise in the bushes. Low down, nuzzling its way through the plantfloor came a very curious looking animal. I was sitting very quietly so it didn't see me. It was a very careful, spiny and 'nosy' little brown animal. 'Sir hedgehog i presume', i said. But it didn't reply and just mozied back into the woods after a quick look around.

I picked one up before in the street, but it was small and sick. This one was a big old timer, i think, who came to check out was i was doing messing around in his garten ;)

Existe una forma de saber si ya cumpliste tu misión en la vida. Si sigues vivo es porque aún no la cumpliste.

Here is a test. To find out whether your mission on earth is finished: If you are still alive, it is not. -- Richard Bach in Illusions

white panda blues

ah my panda car is nearly ready to face the swiss RPB test. that's the Road Perfection Brigade. It seems one is unlikely to pass the vehicle test if you bring your car in yourself. I found that out practically. No, you need to pay the garage to do it for you. So luckily my panda ended up with a good car doctor and he fixed her most glaring faults and even volunteered to take her into battle next week. so much for DIY. well at least i de-rusted and spray painted her.

Feeling very sanguine lately

The ancient greeks developed the idea of the 4 humours - sanguine, melancholic, choleric, and phlegmatic. Now i wonder how our modern word humorous became associated with just one of the original, namely sanguine, but i sure as hell need more of this humor right now. I'll relate a vague personal story to show i might b on the right path :P I recently really really wanted 'something' from a someone; and, well, someone else got what i want and i, i received 2 beer glasses as 'consolation prize'(troosprys). I proceded to use them to get drunk over the span of two weeks but it's only recently that i've seen the humourous irony of the gift. Humour in disaster. haha. And don't get me wrong, i love my beer glasses...even more now. well i have to, they're all i've got ;)

a spy in the house of many loves

The enemy of love is never outside,
it´s what we lack in ourselves.
- Anais Nin

luana's work

Luana

goes foteli hunting after





Finn

it's raining again...

a 'curl up before the fire' day. I don't normally like to talk about meditation but today was interesting. To see some of the phases i go through while meditating: getting comfortable, cycling through recent events, fantasy, doing techniques, concentration,etc. and then suddenly one realises this traffic of inner voices and events and then the 'real' meditation starts :) today it only happened right at the end and then such energy come into play it was hard for me to stop at the end of the hour. phew.

But where do you go to my lovely
When you're alone in your bed
Won't you tell me the thoughts that surround you
I want to look inside your head...
- Peter Sarstedt

geil parade

with the help of group energy, some mdma, and techno vibes we had a great time. Some dj's really know their stuff. Here,s a pic of me dressed up for the revelry:


& one i took later of Nicole, Jan & Alex.

street parade

tomorrow is the yearly street parade. a million half-clad gyrating bodies following the tecno piper, and yours truly hopefully leaving his reasonable senses and trousers at home to crawl on different senses.

Yesterday jazz sounds came wafting from the lake to my window and today some reggae sounds. tomorrow it will just be the techno drum drone blasting bodies around ;) c u der.

drunk

today while travelling for some time on the trams and trains, i looked into every face possible, into the eyes of every person around me. i saw no one really alive except the old man on the bridge selling the 'homeless' newspaper. at one stage on a tram their was a vicious fight between two old 'whores' about money. few people noticed or reacted, and the driver of the tram, a woman, came to the back to get them out. i am a dead man living in the land of the dead. only the mountains here are alive. the mountains and animals... and young children.

i guess it says as much of me as of anything else.

sontag zazen

This morning something special happened during our sunday morning meditation. for the first time i stopped trying to medidate and just sat. sit. sat. i read about the zen practice of 'sitting' but i never understood untill today :) and what is strange is that when i started to 'sit' i started to float and fly. curious curious world.

i also did a dreamlike ceremony but about that i cannot write yet.

He who controls others may be powerful,
but he who has mastered himself is mightier still.
-- Lau Tsu

custom open air

Yesterday was the annual gabler open air kino night. A very nice idea to have the whole building together for a outdoor movie night which is shown big on the wall of the neighbouring building. We braai'ed, and watched the classic Bladerunner... with some loud fireworks thrown in because 1st of august is switzerland's national day.

cine paradiso

from one of the greatest paul movies of all time :) ..director's cut. And the music is bellisima tambien.

ALFREDO: I want to make you happy, Toto! I'm going to tell you a story.

Once upon a time a king gave a feast and there were all the most beautiful princesses of the realm. Basta, one of the guards, saw the king's daughter: she was the loveliest of all! And he immediately fell in love with her. But what could a poor soldier do compared with a king's daughter?!...One day he managed to meet her and told her he couldn't live without her. The princess was so struck by the depth of his feeling that she said to the soldier 'If you will wait a hundred days and a hundred nights beneath my balcony, then in the end I'll be yours.' Christ, the soldier ran off there and waited! One day, two days, ten, twenty...Every night she looked out of her window, but he never budged. Come rain, wind, snow, never budged! The birds shat on him and the bees ate him alive! After ninety nights he was gaunt and pale and tears streamed from his eyes but he couldn't hold them back. He didn't even have the strength to sleep any more. The princess kept watch...And on the ninety-ninth night, the soldier got up, picked up his chair and left!

And don't ask me what it means. If you figure it out, let me know...

way of viaobuntu

I installed and am tweaking my new linux ubuntu operating system. this release is called the hoary hedgehog. it's great and i think i'll stick with it. bye bye windows. otherwise i'm a bit sad and just working on all sorts of things from cars to floors to websites to keep myself occupied.

Please don't pass me by

Last night i (telescopically speaking that is) studied the moon in a little better detail than before. amazing the craters and 'seas'. it takes a long time to get to know someone, and the moon.

Cohen: "I don't think too much. I never think, to tell you the truth. My own personal life is chaotic. Anybody who looks at my own personal life will come to the conclusion, rapidly, that I don't think at all. There's a kind of interior urgency about all things, as I see it. And I respond to it. I generally respond to it, in real life, in exactly the wrong way of doing things. As a friend of mine once said, 'Now Leonard, are you sure you're doing the wrong thing.' I hardly have a thought in my head. Something happens, you know, and I have to answer it with a poem or a song or my own work. I don't know a thing about love."

top heavy strains the back

must i learn to stand and walk again? me, an old man! yes Saul saith the lorD, nevermind once laddy, for unless ye be born again every day or every hour ye shall become an old and dry stick, no good for anything but firewood.
ok lorD but i find it quite funny to learn such a trick as an older dog.

When gods die, they always die many kinds of death. Nietzsche from Thus spake Zarathustra

summer, fall, winter, spring

Jan and me went to watch an outdoor film at the filmfluss open air kino - www.filmfluss.ch. What a way to watch a movie, on the banks of the schöni letten rivier with the moon and jupiter setting behind the screen as the movie ran. And it was a very good movie as well. About the life of a buddhist monk living with his teacher in a small monastry in the middle of a lake. Extraordinary cinematography.

asi es, asi fue, asi sera,si o no..claro que si

"Quiero estar junto a la persona que amo.
No quiero saber el precio que habré de pagar.
No quiero saber si será bueno o malo para mi vida.
No quiero saber si esa persona me quiere o no
Lo único que necesito, lo único que deseo, es estar cerca de la persona que amo.
- de la obra La buena alma de Tse-Chuang, de Bertold Brecht

my girl in the moon

as i was walking home just now, with my telescope in my hand and thinking of the little prince and his quest, would you believe, a fox ran across the road in front of me. yes i know i should have spoken to him, but i was too surprised to see a fox in the city. hopefully we will meet again. a fox is a good friend to have and gives good advice on flowers... ;)

turning and turning

yesterday the sun turned and a great yellow moon rose nonchalant. In a few days 3 planets gather together on the horizon. what does this mean for my life, for others' life? tonight i feel empty and full. i love her. lets drink another beer boys.

Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
....

-- extract from the Second Coming, W. B. Yeats

in bed

with a paticularly noxious stomach and bowel demon which turns my nights into sweat, pain and dream inducing rollarounds ;)

Maybe one needs a warm heart to lie. for many years and to a large degree still i couldn't lie and didn't like too. i can control my feelings. It's true that often lying is the easy way out. but i now think it can also be a hard and caring thing to do...especially when it's not easy, for example the nazis nock on your door and your hiding fugitives, or your girlfriend asks if her new hairstyle looks good ;)

in one sense lying is part of communication and lying with your whole heart under difficult circumstances is sometimes the most caring thing to do. sorry mom ;)
actually 'just like anything else' it isn't an either/or thing. There's truth and lies in every statement of ours and just the balance between them varies.

professor meta
chao

happy hitchhiking Douglas

flying is easy, just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Deadlines.... how I love the whooshing sound they make as they rush past.

--Douglas Adams

1001 wakeups

Last night felt really really loooong. I had never turned around so much..from side to side, to back, to stomach, to side...must be because my back is sore. I also had some strange dreams and then in the middle of the night there was a terrific thunderstorm with great lightning. Now that was lessig.

Oh yes and today i get my new old panda...that is a fiat panda to flee with to the mountains :)