grotto without limitation

Went with d'Yvonne yesterday to visit and meditate at the Emma Kunz zentrum in Würenlos. Really a beautiful and peaceful place.

violence breeds violence

The Americans have developed an incredibly simple philosophy: anything goes if Americans benefit from it.

- Swiss senator Dick Marty.

'Without going out of doors, one may know the whole world; without looking out of window, one may see the Way of Heaven. The farther one travels, the less one may know.'

the lazy shady bright side of work

i currently experience working from my hammock in our garden and bird-filled forest :)
Dear lorD, can this state be made the default ;)

a secret

is revealed

dark i

that which you deny or repress you give more power

for J

The voice, Afghan matchmakers say, is more than half of love

- Shantaram, p. 24

Everyone, he said later, when his one year in the slum had become three and five and then eight, is connected to Fate through the will of God, and it's not until we open our hearts to what we fear, that we hear Fate knocking at the door of our lives.

- Qasim Ali Hussein

energies ahoy

Last night was full of strange energies. We spent the lovely evening on the K. balcony just chatting like lazy stones for the first time in a long while.

I had a strange dream in the morning which was difficult to capture but here is my best try. In the dream we were sleeping and i was having what i can best describe as pre-cognitive dreams. I dreamt that something bad was about to happen to Mojo's wife. Two woman with me went to try and prevent or help with this event that was about to occur. I 'saw' many dreams very similar but some 'felt' different and they were the right ones to 'take'. The dreams were symbolised as a musical pieces. The process had a feeling of inevitability - we cannot stop the future even though we know what is going to happen. Perhaps the choosing of the dreams had something to do with my decision last night to start writing down my dreams. I alo thought that choosing the correct dream was like a thank offering to God, a blessing.

back to the lake

Returned home today after great fires, food and sleep:) Thanks all.

I feel lots of new things are afoot at the moment. Feelins and truth and facing them. I haven't talked about my feelings in a long time but the captain will sit down soon and write them down in his starblob.

Maya is the many veils decorating the nameless

green hills of germany

I drove up to B's farmhouse near Tübingen yesterday. Went through a pretty rough storm but it was nice to be cruising on my own and the countryside is beautiful.

I had a great sleep and an interesting dream. I forget the beginning, but it felt like a group of us participated in some ceremony standing half submerged in water. Then afterwards I confronted an older man who seemed to be my teacher. This was a first. I shouted at him in mock fury that this enlightenment bussiness was a lot of crap and that i am tired of trying to become like this etc. etc. He just looked at me and said nothing. In the last part of the dream I was together with someone else and the teacher came and wanted to cut away the robe/shirt i was wearing. It was open at the front but still connected by a 'fixed' piece of a zipper just over my heart. I said that my mother is not going to like this as she was the one who made the zipper. I thought that maybe i could still repair it afterwards if needed. He went ahead and cut the robe open.

my dream woman

Last night my anima or soulmate came to talk to me in a dream. she was all i could ever dream of and a friend :) does she exist in the physical world too?

woman in the wood

I had the strangest dream(s) last night. Me, my frien J. and some children were somewhere in a room and J. was explaining/giving a lecture to us on how when children enter into or through the 'wood-world'(another dream world?) they can usually return but that occasionally they do get trapped there (for a while?). There was also the prostrate (sleeping?) figure of a young girl with us. Somehow she was centrally
involved in what we were doing or discussing. Then i think i tried it and entered into or through the 'wood'. I got in but then unxpectedly someone or thing came out of nowhere and gave me a 'fright'(something like saying BOO! behind me). I got such a fright that i immediately awoke shouting something out loud. It was unexpected but i didn't feel malice yet. But things changed. For the rest of the night i was drifting in and out of sleep having the feeling that something sinister is behind my head hiding in the wood and perhaps living in the wood next to my bed. I got the feeling it was a woman and that she is not very friendly towards me. I was feeling very violent(read scared) in my other dreams because i several times told her to go away and when i later saw a cat or kitten looking straight at me in a dream i very aggresively stared it down, mistakenly thinking it might be the woman or sent by her. I approached it and picked it up, softly because i realized i had an open swiss army knife in my right hand. what a night!

farewell to a krokodil

Monday night was the farewell 'fire' to Mojo down at the rote fabrik. The staff made dinner and the old krokodil band members teamed up for a few blazing rock songs. Man they're good. His brothers also joined to make some great music. But someone was missing. Travel well Mojo.

meditation is

... being with yourself.

dreary sky

My enemy is my helper

- old sufi or christian mystic saying.

The love we need to 'hunt' is inside ourselves. But that love is difficult prey. You have to be very fast ... because anything can distract you from your goal. If you can capture the 'prey' you will see that your love can grow strong inside you and it can fulfill all your needs.

-The Mastery of Love, Don Miguel Ruiz.

I cannot recommend this book too highly, least of all to myself :) So straight and powerfull. And the audio book is read by a well-known couple with wonderful voices.

an interview with Don Miguel Ruiz and
www.miguelruiz.com

a watery grave

I had a restless night last night and an ominous dream. Unfortunately i've forgotten the start of it because it seemed significant and interesting. A group of us where together somewhere on a platform, busy with some ceremony or experiment? My impression is that it was a success and something bright and round materialized among us or we were indeed the pattern that formed. At this the scene shifted slightly and we now appeared to be high on a narrow gangway. Far below us was an ocean shore. Suddenly the others pushed me and an older woman off the plank. It happened unexpectedly and as we were near the edge i lost my balance and fell. Right beneath us there were people swimming and rocks and i was very concerned of hitting them. So i angled my descent away towards the open ocean. I now felt fear as it was very high. I tried to hit the water at an angle so that i wouldn't go so deep. As i went in i immediately started to check my descent by paddling upwards. However as i went down knew it was useless. I was going too deep. There wouldn't be enough air left in my lungs to reach the surface again.
Afterwards i sensed or overheard? that the older woman had died as well. Her bones where shattered on impact with the water.

An unusual dream and message. As far as i can recall i haven't died in a dream before.

half-moon rising

With the spring night warm and lingering me and M sat down together on the steps and didn't leave them until the night slept deeply and the tips of our noses and bodies were warm.

blowing in the wind

our lives are like writing with a stick on water

- the Buddha.

Part of Me

Life and death.

Mojo, my roommate died silently yesterday in his bed. He drank himself to death after his wife died suddely a few years ago, but I don't know that much. All i know is that i love him and will miss him. We weren't close; our personalities and lives and ages being very different but when i feel and remember his soul, he was or is an especially beautiful being. He was also a great musician, a rock star in his time, the seventies, playing for the swiss progressive rock band Krokodil. He played the guitar, harmonica and flute and the few times i heard him still play these instruments it was wunderschön.

You can read a little about the band here and also listen to one of their songs, You're Still a Part of Me at the first link.

Swiss Pop&Rock Anthology

Swiss Rock
last.fm - Krokodil
krokodil

Uf wiederhöre Mojo
Paul

Mojo Kurt M Weideli 1 Oct 1948 - 26 Apr 2006

Death & mayhem

Today is the 20 year anniversary of the Chernobil disaster.
This is a good if somewhat unusual site to get a glimpse of what happened there. Follow Elena on her journey:

Elena's fotos

And if you want to know about a current disaster read about the major war going on in the DRC:

The war the world forgot

harm and health

This morning i was watching some nicevideos of a workshop gien by Ken Wilber and others and afterwards showering this showerthought ran out the faucet over my head and into me: we cannot do any harm unto others without harming ourselves. Of course sometimes this is necessary, as when we kill to eat, or punish to teach, or go cold turkey to break a habit.

And the reverse is just as true. the least good we do, we do unto ourselves also. This Jesus said, which is fitting on this day. Thanks showerhead ;)

So that is also an answer as to why i'm usually a sortof-vegetarian: because it is easier 'for me', it costs less 'for me', and it does the least harm to all of us.

Two nights ago i had an extra-ordinary clear dream. I was ascending Chomolangma(mnt everest) with a tibetan guide/sherpa and a small group of people. The atmosphere was clear and cold and our purpose intense. At one point we rested and about 2 hours higher up i discovered i must have 'forgotten' my backpack lower down. We stopped and my/the guide came down and i realized he didn't have it either. He felt sorry(in a non-guilty way) that he hadn't looked after me better but implied unworriedly that i could continue without it. For me that was out of the question. I could not entertain that option at all and he silently undestood that. He handed me a parcel and two red postcards. I felt i was to read them when i reached my backpack. The postcards contained good wishes/news from 2? woman, and that would give me the added hope and inspiration to climb back up and again join the party(who would continue). interesting. what message is my soul and unconscious singing to me?

complicated road to nowhere or the unbearable lightness of now

why do we make everything so difficult? What happened to play and fun and flow? Perhaps we seek too hard. We work so hard and try to control so much to reach these new nowhere's.

Well we know where we’re goin’
But we don’t know where we’ve been
And we know what we’re knowin’
But we can’t say what we’ve seen
And we’re not little children
And we know what we want
And the future is certain
Give us time to work it out

We’re on a road to nowhere
Come on inside
Takin’ that ride to nowhere
We’ll take that ride

I’m feelin’ okay this mornin’
And you know,
We’re on the road to paradise
Here we go, here we go

Maybe you wonder where you are
I don’t care
Here is where time is on our side
Take you there...
take you there

We’re on a road to nowhere
We’re on a road to nowhere
We’re on a road to nowhere

There’s a city in my mind
Come along and take that ride
And it’s all right, baby, it’s all right

And it’s very far away
But it’s growing day by day
And it’s all right, baby, it’s all right

They can tell you what to do
But they’ll make a fool of you
And it’s all right, baby, it’s all right

We’re on a road to nowhere

- -Talking Heads.

fun and games

I'm having fun playing around with my fast new Xfce desktop,alias Xubuntu.

A person with ubuntu is open and available to others, affirming of others, does not feel threatened that others are able and good, for he or she has a proper self-assurance that comes from knowing that he or she belongs in a greater whole and is diminished when others are humiliated or diminished, when others are tortured or oppressed

.

- Archbishop Desmond Tutu.