my girl in the moon

as i was walking home just now, with my telescope in my hand and thinking of the little prince and his quest, would you believe, a fox ran across the road in front of me. yes i know i should have spoken to him, but i was too surprised to see a fox in the city. hopefully we will meet again. a fox is a good friend to have and gives good advice on flowers... ;)

turning and turning

yesterday the sun turned and a great yellow moon rose nonchalant. In a few days 3 planets gather together on the horizon. what does this mean for my life, for others' life? tonight i feel empty and full. i love her. lets drink another beer boys.

Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
....

-- extract from the Second Coming, W. B. Yeats

in bed

with a paticularly noxious stomach and bowel demon which turns my nights into sweat, pain and dream inducing rollarounds ;)

Maybe one needs a warm heart to lie. for many years and to a large degree still i couldn't lie and didn't like too. i can control my feelings. It's true that often lying is the easy way out. but i now think it can also be a hard and caring thing to do...especially when it's not easy, for example the nazis nock on your door and your hiding fugitives, or your girlfriend asks if her new hairstyle looks good ;)

in one sense lying is part of communication and lying with your whole heart under difficult circumstances is sometimes the most caring thing to do. sorry mom ;)
actually 'just like anything else' it isn't an either/or thing. There's truth and lies in every statement of ours and just the balance between them varies.

professor meta
chao

happy hitchhiking Douglas

flying is easy, just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Deadlines.... how I love the whooshing sound they make as they rush past.

--Douglas Adams

1001 wakeups

Last night felt really really loooong. I had never turned around so much..from side to side, to back, to stomach, to side...must be because my back is sore. I also had some strange dreams and then in the middle of the night there was a terrific thunderstorm with great lightning. Now that was lessig.

Oh yes and today i get my new old panda...that is a fiat panda to flee with to the mountains :)

in the longing of perfection lies our fulfillment

You tell me that you fear love; why, my little one? Do you fear the light of the sun? Do you fear the ebb and the flow of the sea? Do you fear the dawning of the day? Do you fear the advent of spring? I wonder why you fear love?
...
Oh, Mary, do not fear love; do not fear love, friend of my heart. We must surrender to it in spite of what it may bring in the way of pain, of desolation, of longing, and in spite of all the perplexity and bewilderment.

--Kahlil Gibran

the d.evil

Had a very strange dream. A figure appeared seemingly evil, with a hideous visage with no skin. I became as angry(..or fearful?) as never before and cast all my energy (spells?) to destroy him. but try as i might my hands could only move in slow motion and i couldn't see if i was having any effect on him. He seemed to say that he was winning because my heart had already become like him, full of anger and hate. i woke up fearing something was trying to take over my soul.

A man dreamed a dream, and when he awoke he went to his soothsayer and desired that his dream be made plain unto him.

And the soothsayer said to the man, "Come to me with the dreams that you behold in your wakefulness and I will tell you their meaning. But the dreams of your sleep belong neither to my wisdom nor to your imagination." --Khalil Gibran

The Queen of Swords

The Crystallizer or The Judgment. It is the watery quality of air, representative of its elasticity and transmissive power...it cuts through the masks and securities of the old world. The vision of this card is far-sighted and cannot be trapped by the illusions of the present. The Queen of Swords is symbolic of risk-taking by the acceptance of new roles and the breaking of old habits. In doing so, lies the promise of understanding and liberation.

the Queen of Swords is associated with Atalanta, the gifted huntress and athletic heroine of Greek legend who went to great lengths in order to avoid marriage, challenging each potential suitor to outpace her in a foot race. :)

the moon's faces

Emotions confused, frantic, and skewed, deception; "moonstruck."

A day not easily describable, emotionally quite unstable, but one in which the experience of oneness&noneness came to me at its end in an unexpected, effortless and beautiful way.

doa, paradise and the river

so this is my latest treatise on good and evil, the dao and the absolute.
in the garden of eden man indeed became free like goD, and so 'evil' appeared(although of course the process had been there from the start).

The river, the dao,goD flows and we are in it, a part of it. but since we are becoming more free, aware, god-like we also to shape the river we are in with our desires. Some more skillfully than others but all contributing to the river and in fact we are the river. We may exhaust ourselves directly against it(so called evil) or flow with it, or anything in between and all our actions influence it. Though in the end all flows to the sea and in the beginning from the sea. So it is and goes.

You can be more like goD or less, move up or down, towards love or indifference, build or break, joy or pain, more intelligent or idiotic. But we remain in the body of goD. As a cell it is easier to move and work with the whole and the purpose of the whole, and yet to go against it is also part of it. Death and life, good and evil - the eternal dance.