i now and again think of contacting old flames. i'm sure this must be a very common desire since i saw it in that movie with whathisname. i've not really done it, except to have lunch, ten years later, with my first girlfriend. but that wasn't in desperation. but maybe i should, just to see what happens. mostly what i want to ask them is what they are doing, and to explain to me what went wrong. yes that sounds like the typical process. a desire is born of loneliness and probably because something is going wrong in a current realtionship. we have the false hope that maybe the potential of the past could be revived or at least that the good aspects revived. truly a hopeless quest.
¨...this will reverse the effect of the worlds mad plunge into suffering for the last two hundred million years...what a lovely night that will be...as the senile robins become bright red again...¨
-Leonard Cohen
i just want to say one thing late on a thursday night in a foreign country. after all that i've said. after all that i have learnt about human nature and carnal nature. against reason, i'm in love her with all my being...
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